'Mum left for Dignitas in a taxi - I still dream that she's coming back'

A grieving daughter who was forced to say a final goodbye to her mum as she left in a taxi for Dignitas has urged MPs to back the bill when it returns to the Commons this week. Catie Fenner, 37, is still affected by the trauma her family endured during her mum Alison's "surreal and heartbreaking" final months.

The 68-year-old had been diagnosed with a fast-progressing form of in June 2022, and was told she likely had one to two years to live. Teacher Catie said: "Her symptoms were coming on very quickly. She did not want to see the disease through to the end. She was an academic, a musician, she loved walking and singing. All of that was going to be taken away from her.

"She was a very independent woman, she didn't want to have to rely on people."

Alison initially told only Catie's dad of her decision to register with Dignitas. The couple spent several stressful months trying to gather the mountain of medical evidence needed to prove eligibility, which even included dental records.

When Alison finally told Catie and her sister Becky, they supported her choice. But Catie knew "life was going to change because of the secrecy and deceit that you realise you're going to have to take on in your life".

She added: "Mum said she wanted to go that autumn or winter, and I thought, 'My God, I'm going to lose you sooner than I wanted to because you have to be able to travel.'"

At one point, Alison's brother came to visit for what the family knew would be the last time - but they felt unable to tell him of her plan. Catie added: "We hated lying to people."

When Alison decided it was time to travel to the Dignitas clinic in , she did not want her daughters to make the trip "because of the worry about us getting prosecuted".

Catie, of Didcot, recalled: "We had to say goodbye to her early in the morning, at 6am, putting her in a taxi as she left for the airport.

"That was our physical goodbye. It was pretty horrendous. We couldn't break down because we couldn't give away to the taxi driver what was going on."

The sisters met their dad at the airport when he returned alone. Catie said: "We ran to him and he just collapsed on me. He came back an exhausted and broken man."

Without Alison's body, the family was unable to hold a proper funeral but organised a celebration of life.

In the months that followed, Catie found it hard to comprehend that her mum was truly gone. She said: "It didn't feel real because my sister and I didn't see it happen.

"Our grief was incredibly disrupted. I have dreams all the time that she comes back, that she went away for some kind of treatment and she's going to come back."

The Terminally Ill Adults (End of Life) Bill is due to return to the Commons on Friday for a report stage debate.

If the bill then passes a third reading vote, it will progress to the House of Lords. Catie, who helps to run a local Oxfordshire branch of campaign group Dignity in Dying, urged MPs to support the legislation.

She said: "I just don't want any family to go through what we did. It could have been a very different ordeal, so much easier.

"If she had been able to have it in this country, she would have been surrounded by more people, we wouldn't have had to keep it a secret, and wouldn't have had that stress.

"Seeing her die would have been incredibly difficult, but would have given us closure."